Eben Pagan - Double Your Dating
Part 1: How To Think About Success With Women
Chapter 1: Women Don't Make Sense
- Although every woman is an unique creature, women have more commonalties than they have differences.
- Most women think differently than most men and most women want different things than most men.
- Most women have a few main interests, needs, desires, or whatever you want to call them when it comes to men, relationships, and romance.
- Think about what the woman that you're interested needs and wants, and don't assume that these are the same things that you need and want. It doesn't matter if it makes sense, as long as it works.
- Females select males most of the time in nature. Point out when talking to women that you are the selector and not the selectee. Most likely she's never heard that from a man in her entire life, which makes you different in a desirable way. Example: "I'm about to tell you something (or something about you) that no one has ever told you..."
- If you help people to have profound realizations, they'll see you as a guru rather than seeing the information or themselves as powerful. It doesn't matter where the info came from, as long as it's something that the person has never really thought about in that way (that's also profound to her). Example: "You don't have me fooled for a minute, dear."
- Women often view men picking up on them as a sort of game.
- You must behave as if you confidently believe that you are the best thing for a woman, and that you are going to make her feel wonderful inside. When you're talking to a woman, imagine how good you're going to make her feel. Women will notice.
- Learn to never let a woman act like a Brat without you calling her on it (and in a cool, almost indifferent way!). The solution is to not kiss ass or do things for them like everyone else. Be different.
- An average looking man that takes good care of himself and makes enough money to live comfortably, who is cocky, direct, challenging, confident, funny, and in control - one who challenges her constantly and never kisses her ass ever - will be far more fulfilling to a beautiful woman than the other types.
- Remember that just about every thought and behavior that a woman has, no matter how little sense it may make to you, has some positive intention behind it. So as you work to become more successful with women, remember to not take things personally.
- The moral idea of monogamy has been formalized, passed down, and force-feed to us culturally by rulers, religions and women for thousands of years. But from now forward, don't let anyone or anything make you feel bad because of your natural desires and attraction to women.
- If you want to get people to follow you, first confuse them, then convince them that you know the way to get them out of their confused state. Easy.
Chapter 2: How I Discovered What Works With Women
- "It's OK to be a man."
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Do as much as you can to improve. Get a cool hair
style, buy nice clothes. Learn what nice shoes are, and how to
keep them nice. Never overdo it, but keep improving all the time,
even if it's the smallest detail. Here's a list:
- Keep all nails on your body short, clean and neat.
- The only place hair is good is on your head. Keep all other hair trimmed, or have it removed. Nose and ear hairs are a no-no. Bushy eyebrows are a no-no. Bushy pubic hairs are a no-no.
- Keep the teeth clean. Get a tongue scraper and use it a lot. Floss. Use mouthwash. Fix any blatantly wrong teeth. Do it.
- Wash yourself three times when you shower. Dirt and body odors don't come off with just a rinse. Wash your body completely three times before you meet a woman.
- Use a good deodorant (I don't like anti-perspirants, as they block your lymph system).
- Keep feet, shoes, and socks ultra clean. No foot odor is permitted, period.
- Get a good cologne. Try Dolce and Gabanna, Cerruti Image, or Gaultier for men. And don't over-do it! No cologne is better than a lot of cologne. One or two squirts, applied an hour before you're going to be meeting women is best.
- Get the right attitude. Don't think of all kinds of things that could go wrong. Understand that many of the women that you talk to aren't interested. Don't take that personally, but move on. Once you find a style that works for you, stick with it, and only change it because you choose to!
- If you have some area of your life that isn't working for you, you probably need a new skill. There are many parts to being successful with women, so you better start practising now!
- Negative self-talk is one of the primary causes of low self-esteem, giving up, and a lack of interest in even trying. Begin taking a positive mind-set and talk to yourself in a positive way. Belief in the feedback you'll get.
- You can have good feelings any time you want! Just imagine you are in a positive state! Create a trigger to get you into this state whenever you need it.
- Choose an outcome for yourself, and apply what you're learning to that outcome. Failing to plan is planning to fail.
Part 2: How To Communicate With Women
Chapter 3: How To Develop A Personality That Is Irresistible To Women
- Women are attracted to men for certain reasons and they go through a specific sequence internally when they are attracted to a man. Once you know what it is, you can develop a method to create this sequence more often.
- Be different in an attractive way, but don't get too carried away.
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Your enemy is insecurity and neediness. Insecurity and neediness to avoid:
- Hanging on a woman. Don't touch a woman or crowd her too much in the beginning. Instead, lean back and let her become comfortable being around you.
- Talking or saying negative things about women or past girlfriends.
- Having emotional responses to things.
- Looking to others to make decisions. Women like it when you decide what's going to happen. Just make decisions and go with it.
- Saying or doing things to just to be noticed or to get compliments. Don't do it.
- Arguing. Some people feel like they need to argue with everything. If you really want to argue with something, do it in a funny way, not in a serious way.
- A woman will get into a long-term relationship with a man that she's sleeping with. But she won't be as likely to sleep with a man who's courting her. So don't do any of this courting shit.
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If you want to meet women, you have to:
- Decide what kind of woman you want.
- Find out what is attractive to her and be it.
- Go where these women are likely to be (or set up a situation where they come to you).
- Approach them and engage (or, if you can figure out how to get them to approach you, do that).
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The six things that attract women:
- Means: wealth, possessions, gifts to them or providing for them
- Power: influence, leadership, provide safety
- Fame
- Looks: including height
- Exclusivity: royalty, already married, hard to get, affiliation
- Personality: humor, creativity, romance, intelligence, mystique etc.
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Personality traits that attract women:
Funny Intelligent & creative Educated Classy & cultured Dominant Thoughtful Notices significant details (Un)predictable Enthusiastic, fun, happy Adventurous Aggressive Confident & cocky Expertise Attention Disinterest, indifference, a challenge Charm Romantic imagination & perspective Expert in body language Sexual mastery &nsbp; - Do yourself a favor. If you are having trouble, get help. Women are amazingly generous when they are helping a man get his attractiveness together.
Chapter 4: How To Use Communication And Humor To Attract Women
- Women test men, that's common knowledge. They mainly look for a man who's in control and challenging. Hotties often live in another reality and are thus great targets. Watch for the tests and be ready when they come.
- Do nice things for them on your own terms. Surprise women with a thoughtful email (or a card), give them occasionally a nice massage. Open all freaking doors and walk on the outside of the curb...
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Rules of thumb (of course, 'never' should not be taken that seriously):
- Never give a woman a direct answer unless the answer is no.
- If she complains about you or doesn't like something, turn it up a notch and do it more.
- Never give a woman exactly what she asks for... ever!
- Always send mixed signals. Keep your unpredictability.
- The very attractive women are approached all the time, so you gotta be different, cocky and funny, unique and interesting and you have to give her the feelings that she wants and playing the part of the man that her unconscious wants.
- Rapport is nice, but breaking rapport in a funny and charming way works also.
- This is your reality, and she is a guest.
- Strong, exceptional, interesting men who are in control of themselves and their realities are as rare for women as super hot women are rare for men. Add some humor to it and you get laid before you can even spell it out.
- A man must be confident, arrogant, and dominant, but definitely not weak, shy and submissive.
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How to mentally approach meeting a new woman:
"I'm cocky and funny, I steal their lines, I tease them, and I don't ever give them a break." - Don't focus on your yoke lines. Develop a character that fits them instead.
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How to be funny (crash course):
- Whenever someone has an emotional response to something, say "How do you really feel about it?"
- Say "anyway" and look away quickly after making a wise crack.
- Misinterpret what women say. Always listen for opportunities to misinterpret words like "it".
- Look for sexual innuendo in everything, and use it to accuse her of trying to seduce you before you even know her.
- Exaggerate.
- Connect things around your current affairs in a funny way.
- Don't smile too much, and don't laugh at your own jokes very often.
- When you start with "I think that you're going to make a nice friend", she can never use it on you!
- Play the games that women play on them, you will not believe the responses you get. Always end conversations, meetings, and phone calls first. This includes to never accept demanding or controlling behavior.
- Women love it when you think about them and when you notice things.
- Don't be predictable. Do the unexpected when they least expect it. Don't be too friendly too early. Keep some things a mystery. Do some things that don't make sense.
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Be persistent (within limits of course).
"NO. No. No! No. No. NO! NOOO. Noooo. Make love to me right now!" -
When she asks you a tough question, you don't miss a beat,
and answer with the answer she wants to hear. Then you throw in a
slapstick comedy line.
She: "Are you seeing other women?"
You: "No... other men."
And keep it up.
Chapter 5: On Looks And Body Language
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Body language basics:
- Walk upright, hold your head up, and hold your shoulders back.
- Slow down your movements, and make slower, calculated gestures.
- Make eye contact and keep it when you see women.
- Start taking up more space and opening up your physiology.
- Pause often while you're talking.
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The most obvious and easy sign that a woman is interested:
"Is she acting friendly to me?"
If she is interested, keep going and continue to the next step always. - If you can learn how to talk to women in a way that stimulates their imagination, you can get them turned on over the phone.
Part 3: Exactly What, When, And How
Chapter 6: The Basics Of Style And Class, Plus More On How To Fascinate Women
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Besides keeping your house organized and clean, and keeping
some protection nearby, be prepared for other things:
- Learn to cook a few good meals (and get an unusual apron).
- Learn a few cold reading methods (astrology, tarot cards, palmistry, handwriting analysis, psychics).
- Get a few good props (unusual, interesting, and fascinating things).
- Chivalry (open all doors, pull out all chairs, walk on the outside of the sidewalk).
Chapter 7: Where And How To Meet Women
- Put yourself in a 'high probability situation' to meet women. If you start paying attention, you'll find places where women are more likely to be.
- How to meet women: Ask a woman for her 'opinion' on something like current affairs and interesting trivia that involves gender differences and tension. Then get into Mr. Cocky and Funny mode.
- "The only power any woman has in your life is that which you give her."
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Meeting women online:
- Get an AOL or MSN account.
- Get your pictures rated online and use the one which was rated best.
- Set up a free photo-personal on AOL or MSN, plus check out other online personal sites.
- Learn how to search the member directory on AOL or MSN and start some conversations.
- Watch the conversations in several chat-rooms to learn how to communicate online.
- Learn to type fast.
- Use communication skills to make women laugh online.
- Get a woman on the phone as soon as you possibly can.
- Get more than one picture and ask for details!
- Take care of women who are very nervous about meeting people from the internet.
- To get them interested in you, never act too happy, or that your are too interested.
- Don't focus too much on getting phone numbers and e-mail addresses. Obtaining e-mail addresses is easier and safer than getting phone numbers (so start 'asking' for her e-mail address). Besides, you can always ask for her phone number by e-mail. Also never forget to carry a pen!
Chapter 8: How To Think About Dating
- Your mind-set on dating women is that you're there to qualify them. Not the other way around.
- To women, you are either 'long term relationship' material or 'sex' material. Stick to the latter one first otherwise you keep buying stuff forever!
- Get together for a cup of coffee. Pretend you're a busy man and choose the time. Set the right tone for flaking. Constantly drop hints about just 'being friends'.
- When you meet at your place, let her in and leave almost immediately! At coffee, just sit and be Mr. Funny and Cocky, make jokes, and in general lean back and make 'friends'. After coffee you can consider going somewhere fun to shop (you don't need to buy, just look).
- Remember to never compliment a hot woman on her looks.
Chapter 9: Getting Physical
- Hair stroke test: While at your place, if you can stroke her hair and she is OK with this, you're soon gonna get some! Advance to the smelling phase.
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Wait for her to start doing something that is sexual (effectively making her the aggressor), and tell her:
"All you have to do is say please."
Chapter 10: Keeping Her Attracted To You, Or "How To Have A Long Term Relationship"
- Keep up the fun, interesting, unpredictable behavior. Notice the details. Do thoughtful things.
Posted on 3rd September 2007 by Quintus Hegie
